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The Things PEOPLE Actually SAY!!!!

November 5th 2008 10:00
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: 'I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,'
--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.
(On September 17, 1994, Alabama's Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.)


"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff.'
--Mariah Carey


questions
'Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life,'
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign .


'I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,'
-- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.


'Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,'
--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC.


'That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it,'
--A congressional candidate in
Texas.


'Half this game is ninety percent mental.'
--Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark


'It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.'
--Al Gore, Vice President


'I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix.'
-- Dan Quayle


'We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need ?'
--Lee Iacocca


'The word 'genius' isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.'
--Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.


'We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people.'
-- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instrutor.


'Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.'
--Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina


'Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas.'
--Keppel Enderbery


'If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record.'
--Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman
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Vehicle Registration Tax Disc Excuses

October 1st 2008 14:12
OK so I'm guessing that the UK vehicle Tax Disc system is akin to the Aussie vehicle registration system although the similarities with the system (other than the MOT=Pink slip) ends there.

old car bmw
So while I pull my hair out waiting for my insurance certificate to arrive which I need to get the disc, which by the way they promised to send me guaranteed, to arrive on the last day of my tax disc's validity, and didn't arrive, I thought I'd have another trawl through the DVLA website or RTA equivalent.

[ Click here to read more ]
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The Questions People Ask!

July 16th 2008 10:30
koala
Having been asked the other day whether we, as Australians, live in actual houses? (As opposed to what I don't know - tents perhaps???) I've decided to list some of the most common questions asked by visitors to Australia as were pointed out recently by one of our tourism websites.


Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I've never seen it rain on TV. How do your plants grow? (UK)
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Jokes Guaranteed To Offend

April 16th 2008 08:25
George W Bush shocked
What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

[ Click here to read more ]
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One SHIP Of A Coincidence!

February 3rd 2008 23:30
Some coincidences and incidents in life are just so bizarre it beggars belief!
However such strange coincidences do occur, but still you cannot help but shake your head and wonder.

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With so many people living all over the world and with so much of our planet consisting of water, if you had to make a guess at the world time zone in which most people live, where do you imagine it would be?
World map free

You not only have to balance out water and land versus population, but also where those populations actually exist, that is to say that while it's fine to say that Australia only has 21 million people as the Australian Bureau of Statistics is now claiming, the majority live along the coastal areas due to the inhospitable nature of Australia's arid interior.

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Santa Claus/ Father Christmas/ St Nicholas/ Kris Kringle, whatever name you call him, this is one man of which it can be said he has many names.

Depending on the country you're in, he could very well be called more than one name. In Australia he's usually referred to as Santa Claus, but occasionally other names pop up.

[ Click here to read more ]
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Christmas Turkeys & Christmas Dinners

December 14th 2007 00:05
turkey
In both the United Kingdom and the United States of America, turkeys are the currently the main choice for Christmas dinner.

In fact, before turkeys became popular in the UK, it was the custom to eat goose. Then during one particular Christmas, British monarch Henry VIII decided to try a turkey dinner.

[ Click here to read more ]
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Still On Hiatus

November 5th 2007 10:47
Hi all, thanks to our internet provider who has not been providing internet, our temporary hiatus has become much longer than expected. I've managed to squeeze a few moments out of somebody else's internet for this post, but I won't have much more for at the earliest half a week, but hopefully by this time next week at least.

So the facts I give today will be a brief fun-down of where we're at personally.

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You might think the English language to be the same world over in English speaking countries, but not so.

The range of variations is quite wide between say Australian English, British English and American English.

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FAIRY BREAD - A Cultural DELICACY???

September 19th 2007 10:14
OK, so here's the story..... something that I, like may other Aussies have grown up with is the simple idea of taking buttered bread and sprinkling it with either multi-coloured Hundreds & Thousands, or multi-coloured Sprinkles.

So we move to the UK, are in temporary accommodation and Miss 5-almost-6 is about to have a birthday. Hmmm, we need something simple and easy for her classmates to share with her on this auspicious occasion that requires no cooking due to lack of cooking equipment, and won't cost a fortune, especially with the conversion rate.
fairybread

[ Click here to read more ]
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Father's Day Dates

August 22nd 2007 00:40
fathers day
No, not the day you send your father out to hook up, although for some of you out there maybe that really is the case, and could be the gift he's been looking for afterall.

But what I'm talking about here is the more socially accepted day on which father's are celebrated. Here in the great land of Aus, Father's Day is traditionally celebrated on the 1st Sunday in September.

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Some Bizarre Deaths of 2006-2007

August 14th 2007 00:35
* 2006 - Steve Irwin, television personality, Wildlife Warrior and owner of Australia Zoo, otherwise known as The Crocodile Hunter, died when his heart was impaled by a short-tail stingray barb while filming a documentary entitled "Ocean's Deadliest" in Queensland's Great Barrier Reef.

Ironically, the stingray was not the creature being filmed. It was deemed "not dangerous enough" to be featured in the documentary.

[ Click here to read more ]
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Temperature And The SCOTS!!!

August 4th 2007 00:40
Scotland flag
When it's:

25 degrees:

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